1. Clear Personality Influences
2. Now Self Integration Package
1. Clear Personality Influences
2. Other Selves Integration Package
Level 2 OTHER SELVES
To Re-Educate the Autonomic Nervous System and Balance the Sympathetic and Parasympathetic Nervous System, Mental Relaxation Technique
Daily - Three times a day for 10 minutes or 20 Minutes Once daily
Lie down or find a comfortable position where you will be undisturbed for the allotted time. Breath naturally and easily, gradually letting your breaths become deeper and increasingly diagphramatic. (Low belly filling up deeply, protruding on inhale and emptying upon exhale)
The goal is to focus on your breath Inhale and "feel" the in-breath as "cool" air inhaling and follow the stream of breath within your passages and exhale the "warm" air in out-breath through the nasal passages. The session goal is to begin a count of a total of 108 breaths Inhale and Exhale and ultimately maintain your focus on your breath without mental chatter disturbance. With consistent practice, one will begin to establish a " witness" function where you will be able to watch your emotional life, inner thoughts with much more objectivity and detachment.
Section your 108 Breaths into 4 counts (quadrants). Focus on your breath, Inhale and then Exhale, count Breath 1 and maintain focus through your count. If you find your mind wander, get distracted or begin inner dialogue, start back to Breath Count One and maintain as far as you may be focused throughout your breathwork session time. The Goal is to ultimately be able to complete the breathwork in one session sequence without needing to recount or restart session.
Maintain count and focus through each of the 4 quadrant sets without starting over, building your endurance and focus throughout the 4 quadrants to a full 108 breath session without needing to restart count..
After mastering this technique, focused or guided meditation and visualization techniques become much more easy to achieve.
Meditation is the skill of focusing 100% of your energy and attention in one specific area in the present moment. The consistent practice of meditation comes with a myriad of health benefits that include increased concentration, decreased anxiety, and a general feeling of well being and connection. Although a great number of people try meditation at some point in their lives, a small percentage actually are consistent with their dedication for the long-term. The most difficult period of reprogramming personal habits or unconscious behaviors is the first 21 days. If commitment and dedication are disciplined with persistence for over the 21 day period, generally it is much easier for the person to continue to maintain their meditation practice. The benefits and rewards of a meditation lifestyle become exceedingly obvious, and the state of inner peace and balance are much easier to achieve in all life situations. Quieting the mind, becoming present to the now moment are the cornerstones of a balanced human being.
The purpose of this article is to provide practical recommendations to help beginners get past the initial resistance and integrate meditation into your lifestyle:
1) Make it a formal practice. You will only get to the next level in meditation by setting aside specific time (preferably two times a day, am and pm) to be still. We suggest the 12D shield practice as a daily meditation.
2) Start with the breath. Breathing deep slows the heart rate, relaxes the muscles, focuses the mind and is an ideal way to begin practice.
3) Stretch first. Stretching loosens the muscles and tendons allowing you to sit (or lie) more comfortably. Additionally, stretching starts the process of “going inward” and brings added attention to the body.
4) Meditate with Purpose. Beginners must understand that meditation is an ACTIVE process. The art of focusing your attention to a single point is hard work, and you have to be purposefully engaged with the process.
5) Notice frustration creep up on you. This is very common for beginners as intrusive or persistent thoughts interrupt our focus. When this happens, really direct focus in on your breath and let the frustrated feelings go.
6) Experiment. Beginners should be more experimental and try different types of meditation. Try sitting, lying, eyes open, eyes closed, there is no wrong position or method if it works for you.
7) Feel your body parts. A great practice for beginning meditators is to take notice of the body when a meditative state starts to take hold. Once the mind quiets, put all your attention to the feet and then slowly move your way up the body (include your internal organs). This is very healthy and an indicator that you are on the right path.
8) Pick a specific room in your home to meditate. Make sure it is not the same room where you do work, exercise, or sleep. Place candles and other spiritual or sacred objects in your room to help you feel at ease.
9) Read a book (or two) on meditation. Preferably an instructional guide AND one that describes the benefits of deep meditative states.
10) Commit for the longer term. Meditation is a life-long practice, and you will benefit most by NOT examining the results of your daily practice. Just do the best you can every day, and then let it go!
11) Listen to instructional audios, videos and CDs.
12) Generate moments of awareness during the day. Finding your breath and “being present” while not in formal practice is a wonderful way to evolve your meditation habits.
13) Make sure you will not be disturbed. One of the biggest mistakes beginners make is not insuring peaceful practice conditions. If you have it in the back of your mind that the phone might ring, your kids might wake, or your coffee pot might whistle than you will not be able to attain a state of deep relaxation.
14) Notice small adjustments. For beginning meditators, the slightest physical movements can transform a meditative practice from one of frustration to one of renewal. These adjustments may be barely noticeable to an observer, but they can mean everything for your practice.
15) Use a candle. Meditating with eyes closed can be challenging for a beginner. Lighting a candle and using it as your point of focus allows you to strengthen your attention with a visual cue. This can be very powerful to maintain focus.
16) Do NOT Stress. This may be the most important tip for beginners, and the hardest to implement. No matter what happens during your meditation practice, do not stress about it. This includes being nervous before meditating and angry afterwards. Meditation is what it is, and just do the best you can at the time.
17) Do it together. Meditating with a partner or loved one can have many wonderful benefits, and can improve your practice. However, it is necessary to make sure that you set agreed-upon ground rules before you begin!
18) Meditate early in the morning or late evening. It is quieter, your mind is not filled with the usual clutter, and there is less chance you will be disturbed.
19) Be Grateful at the end. Once your practice is through, spend 2-3 minutes feeling appreciative of the opportunity to practice and your mind’s ability to focus.
20) Notice when your interest in meditation begins to wane. Meditation is hard work, and you will inevitably come to a point where it seemingly does not fit into the picture anymore. Chances are that losing the ability to focus on meditation is parallel with your inability to focus in other areas of your life!
Meditation is an absolutely wonderful practice in developing yourself and quieting your mind. It can be very difficult in the beginning. Use the tips described in this article to get your practice to the next level!
Practical Tips and Strategies for Controlling Anger and Dealing with Angry People
One of the most common forms that healing crisis can play out in groups of people, especially those without impulse control or self-awareness, is to get really frustrated and angry from not knowing how to express pent up emotions. We have a lot of people on this earth who do not know how to handle or diffuse the intensity of pent up emotional anger that they feel bubbling up from deep inside themselves and sourcing from the collective consciousness. Our culture is not taught about the forms of anger, how to diffuse anger, how to gain control over personal impulses of anger, and how to get to the source of anger before it starts to take complete control over that person’s mind, emotions and body. It is important to recognize, now more than ever, expressing uncontrolled anger and violent outbursts without self-control is dangerous to you and dangerous to others. Expressing anger with violence only breeds more anger around you, and will infuse destructive energies into your life.
Everybody gets angry, but out-of-control rage is very destructive for all involved, and it plays havoc with your own body and attracts negative entities. Here are some tips to help you not lose your cool and be able to stay centered while feeling intense emotions.
Simple relaxation tools such as deep breathing, meditation and relaxing imagery can help calm down angry feelings. (If these feel consistently out of reach, please read 'physiology of fear', to self-assess whether your nervous system may be stuck in fight-flight from unresolved trauma.) If you are involved in a relationship where both partners are hot-tempered, it might be a good idea for both of you to learn these techniques. Do not try to discuss things when tempers are flared, but allow each other to take some space and return to the conversation when feeling more calm.
Some simple steps you can try:
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you're in a tense situation.
Simply put, this means changing the way you think. Angry and disconnected people tend to curse, swear, or speak in highly colorful terms that reflect their inner thoughts. When you're angry, your thinking can get very exaggerated and overly dramatic. Try replacing these thoughts with more reasonable ones. For instance, instead of telling yourself, 'Oh, it's awful, it's terrible, everything's ruined,' tell yourself, 'It's frustrating, and it's understandable that I'm upset about it, but it's not the end of the world and getting angry is not going to resolve it anyhow.'
Be careful of overly dramatic words like 'never' or 'always' when talking about yourself or to someone else. Such as 'This machine never works,' or 'You're always forgetting things' are not just inaccurate, they also feed archetypes of drama and tend to make you feel that your anger is justified and that there is no way to solve the problem. They also alienate and humiliate people who might otherwise be willing to work with you on finding a mutually beneficial solution. It may be helpful to learn non-violent communication skills if your communications do not seem to land as you intend them.
For example, suppose you have a friend who is constantly late when you have made plans to meet. Don't go on the offensive, think instead about the goal you want to accomplish, of getting you and your friend there at about the same time. Avoid saying things like, 'You're always late! You're the most irresponsible, inconsiderate person I've ever met!' The only goal that accomplishes is hurting feelings and putting people on the defensive.
State what the problem is and try to find a solution that works for both of you, or take matters into your own hands and set proper boundaries. For example, you may only set up meetings when you have a lot of flexible time and can bring reading material and relax in a scenic spot until your friend shows up. This way if they are late, you don't feel you are actually waiting for them because you are already enjoying yourself. When we release our rigid expectations of others, and we see them as they really are, we cannot expect them to be something that they are not. When we find greater acceptance for some things that happen to us in life, we also find greater calm and peace. This way, you diminish your own internal stress and your relationships are not damaged.
Remind yourself that getting angry is not going to be positive for your health or fix anything, as it won't make you feel any better and may actually make you feel worse.
Comprehension of the larger picture of events also diffuses personal anger, because anger even when it's justified, can quickly become irrational or mentally obsessive. Commit to see the larger picture, depersonalize the events and remind yourself that to bring peace into your daily life, one must practice being peaceful. Remind yourself that the world is not 'out to get you,' you're just experiencing some of the rough spots. Do this each time you feel anger getting the best of you, and it will help you get into a more balanced perspective. Also use the negative ego clearing tool, 5 steps to clear negative ego is suggested. Learn how to refocus your mind back into positive outlets when in the heat of the moment.
Angry and disconnected people tend to demand things like fairness, appreciation, agreements, or a willingness to do things, in order to control things to go their way. Everyone has preferences and we may feel hurt and disappointed when things do not go they way we would like them to. But angry people demand what they want, rather than build trust to earn what they want, and when their demands aren't being met, their disappointment and frustration can easily become anger. As part of their cognitive restructuring, angry people need to become aware of their demanding nature, and translate their expectations into desires being respectfully communicated to others. In other words, making requests 'I would like this' is healthier than saying 'I demand this' or 'I must have' something done this way right now. When an angry, disconnected person is unable to get what they want, they will experience the common reactions of frustration, disappointment, and hurt. Some angry people use their anger as a way to avoid feeling emotional pain, but that doesn't mean the hurt feelings go away. Most of the time their anger outburst is buried on top of many unresolved emotional conflicts and painful wounding that they have avoided addressing.
Sometimes anger and frustration are caused by very real challenges and inescapable problems in our lives. Not all anger is misplaced and often it's a healthy, natural response to these difficulties. The best attitude to bring to such a situation is to focus not on finding the solution, but rather on how to handle and face the problem in the moment. Suppressing anger is not productive, where acknowledging the feeling and finding a way to release the tension and stress, without harming others around you is productive.
Make a plan and check your progress along the way. (People who have trouble with planning might find a good guide to organizing or time management helpful.) Resolve to give it your best, but don't punish yourself if an answer doesn't come right away. If you can approach the issue with your best intentions and efforts, and you will be less likely to lose patience and fall into all-or-nothing thinking, even if the problem does not get solved right away.
Angry people tend to jump to and act on conclusions, and some of those conclusions can be completely fabricated or assumed as accurate when they are not. The first thing to do if you are in a heated discussion is to slow down and really think your responses through. The key is to learn how to respond rather than react. Don't blurt out the first thing that comes into your head, but slow down and think carefully about what you really want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the other person is saying and take your time before answering them. Unfiltered anger can damage relationships, causing great regret when the anger has subsided.
Listen, to what underlies the angry feelings. For instance, suppose you like a certain amount of freedom and personal space, and your significant other wants more connection and closeness with you. If he or she starts complaining about your activities, don't retaliate by painting your partner as a oppressor, warden, or an albatross around your neck.
It's natural to feel defensive when you're being criticized by another, but don't retaliate with a barb, instead really listen to what lies beneath the words. Learning to become a better listener will improve communication skills and conflict resolution in your relationships considerably. Perhaps the real message is that this person feels neglected and unloved. It may take a lot of patient questioning on your part to uncover this, and it may require some breathing space, but don't let your anger, or a partner's, make a discussion spin out of control into angry words. Keeping your cool and staying calm can keep the situation from becoming disastrous.
Laughter is the best medicine and silly humor can help diffuse anger that is building into rage in a number of ways. Laughter and humor can help you get a more balanced perspective while in the middle of a tense situation. Humor is a powerful strategy to lower our stress levels, and it gives us another way to respond to the situation. If we are able to laugh at ourselves and the situation, it helps to release the emotional tension and reveal that many small things are not enough to get upset about. Looking at a problem from a humorous perspective and finding what is funny about the irony of it all, makes the problem seem less dire and more solvable.
Humor shifts the ways in which we think and thus opens opportunities to be more responsible in controlling our impulses. Finding a few outlets for laughter and humor can be a sanity saver while under a lot of stress. When you feel excessively frustrated or angry, take the situation and shift them to see the funny side, learn to laugh or make the issue lighter to bear. Nourish a sense of humor and find funny movies, comedians, books or songs that make you laugh. Certainly one of my all time favorites is this animal video here.
However, there are two cautions in using humor when addressing problems. First, don't use humor to shrug off personal responsibility to others and try to get away by just 'laughing off' the problem. Rather, use humor to help yourself face problems and conflicts more constructively. Second, don't give in to harsh sarcastic humor, that's just another form of unhealthy aggression.
Anger can be a seriously harmful emotion, but it's often accompanied by ideas that, if examined, can actually make you laugh.
Changing Your Environment
Sometimes it's our immediate surroundings that give us cause for feeling agitated and annoyed. Problems and responsibilities can weigh on you and make you feel angry at the trap you seem to have fallen into, and all the people and things that form that trap.
Give yourself a break. Make sure you have some personal time scheduled during parts of the day that you know are particularly stressful. For example, a working mother might make a standing rule that when she comes home from work, the first 15 minutes will be quiet time. With this brief respite, she will feel better prepared to handle the demands from her kids without blowing up at them.
Some other tips for easing up:
One of the most dangerous features of anger is that expressing anger increases the anger of others around you and this incites violence and harm into the environment. This can lead to a rapid and dangerous escalation of destructive and painful energies spreading like a virus. People may try to harm the target of their anger, whether its justified or not. The impulse to harm is probably a central part of the anger response for most people, thus telling us it directly leads to committing actions of violence and brutality. While anger can be dangerous and must be constrained, it should be acknowledged for the reasons it is there, and not be denied, or covered up by deceptions and lies.
When we learn to control our angry impulses, and stop directing regular angry outbursts at others, choosing instead to source our anger and be responsible for our own behavior, we start to help build our own sense of positively coping with stress, which helps to build our self-esteem and confidence. Self-esteem is what is needed to know that you can get through the challenges and stressors of everyday life without fear or feeling threatened by others because they have different belief systems or perceptions.
Use the Golden Rule treat others as you would like to be treated and notice how things shift in your life!